submitted by anonymous
The thing about “UNsure” things, as opposed to “Sure” things — if there’s even such a thing… is that they give a great big open space for God to work. This I know: I can not “out faithful” God. He always OUT FAITHFUL’S me. The “little” He requires me to be faithful with, ain’t nuthin’ compared to the BIG faithful He doles out, on the regular, in my life — Thank You, Jesus! That being said….
Yikes. I mean serious financial yikes. I work part time, for the same company, for the past 18 years. My income covers a portion of our bills. Probabaly about 1/4. We are 4 people in the house, now. Myself, Husband, and 2 adult sons. One is in college. One has been employed over a decade in the grocery business.
My husband was layed off 3 weeks ago.
My son (the student) was layed off from his seasonal job, 4 weeks ago.
My son was layed off, Dec 7. He worked for Vons/Haggen. That tanked.
Husband has a hernia, which is starting to really bother him. But our health insurance has a $1000.00 deductible. This amount could also be seen as, “the better part of a month’s mortgage payment” — if you catch my drift…
Yikes — yes?
Husband can not collect collect unemployment, because this job he just lost — he had for 6 months, following a year of unemployment, after being let go from a job he had for 34 YEARS! (READ: this man is NOT a flake. He is a worker bee. Responsible. A saver. A tither. A good man. Capisce??)
So I’m trying to not to freak out. I’m looking up. God’s got this. I can’t wait to see how this all turns out.
But those dark clouds of doubt, they can roll over the most resolute of heart. Discouragement comes daily, with the mail…
Pastor Ed gave a sermon, knocked it outta da park! Ministered to my fretful heart. There’s more to this, than what i can see. Watch for God in the now, not just where Ive been, or where I’m going…
Later on, my husband, was reading aloud a passage from a devotional, and the phrase, “the sequence of events is unknown to the participants”… That phrase has resonated through my thoughts all day. I finally had stop work, and figure out what that means…What that “looks like,” in my life??
What’s my faith look like when everyone has a job, compared to when 3 out of 4 of us,in this house, are un-employed?
When his hernia is sittin’ him down, and that $1000.00 deductible to fix it, also looks like better part of a mortgage payment….
What does my faith look like, then? Huh?
I wrote this poem, as kind of a benediction. A stay-the-course- Us+ God = Good, benediction.
I’m sharing it, ‘cuz I bet, others could use a dose of “keep the faith,” every now and then, too..
I have asked my husband to set it music — (he’s super cool like that!) I think it gonna be our “God’s got this,” song.
Trusting God on sunny days
It’s easy giving Him the praise
Dark & thick the clouds roll in
As waters rise, my faith rolls thin..
Peter sank — I sink, too
Thomas doubted — sometimes I do.
Beyond these waves, I seek Your face
A breath prayer whispered, “Jesus / Save.”
I will thank You, in advance
Holding tight to nail pierced hands
In my life I’m making space
Trusting God — Imago dei!
The days to come perhaps make sense
Of my current circumstance
But if my eyes never see the “Why?’s”
I’ll walk by faith, not by sight.
In the sequence of events
Unknown to the participants
You know my name, You count my days
It’s by Your grace, I leap — by faith.